T-2. The Bonk and sweet sugary hell.

So, two days to the operation and still I am bricking it. A little more so given the events of the last few days................ dissolve, wibbly wobbly style to Sunday afternoon.....

It being a nice afternoon: sunny, warm and little wind, and having finished my work around the house, I dragged my old fat body out for a ride with the intention of doing at least 20 miles and perhaps, with a little luck and a fair wind, a few miles more. Sadly that's not the way it turned out.

It started so well however with the "mountains" of Staffordshire put to the sword by my powerful leg muscles. Or, in reality, I managed to drag myself up a couple of slopes which normally cause me issues. Indeed, after 10 miles I was feeling good. And then it hit me, the bonk.

Okay, stop sniggering at the back. To "bonk" means something completely different to a cyclist than it does to a "normal" member of the public. To bonk to a cyclist means that they run out of energy as their blood sugar levels drop to a low level meaning the muscles can't use sugar to form energy. Or something like that. All I know is I was bombing along the airfield road watching the gliders when bammmmmm.... nothing left in the tank....it was like I had been hit by anti aircraft fire and was going down..... sorry.

For such occasions, most cyclists have a "gel" and with the aid of this sticky, horrible mess, I managed to get home a little underpowered and underspeed. My wish for a "long" day in the saddle (long day to me is far different than that for other cyclists!) went out of the window, but another 14.4 miles at 11.8mph was achieved, taking my yearly mileage to over 1 200. Now I know that's not great, but its better than last years and the year befores effort.

So what do I put the bonk down to.... well it might have something to do with how few calories this pre-op diet gives you. For example, on Sunday I started off with one egg, some mushrooms on toast for breakfast and then one diet shake for "lunch." Around, as a rough guess, 500 calories. According to Strava, the ride itself burnt over 800. The diet is also quite low in carbs which are useful when cycling. I do feel I am going to have to watch very, very closely what I eat whilst out cycling to ensure that this doesn't happen again.

Right, finished with bonking, which as a fat bastard CBH will be pleased to hear..... and onto Sweet Sugary Hell....

As part of the pre-op diet, the clinic expects the victim....sorry the person undergoing the treatment to lose some weight and reduce the size of their liver. To do this, they (Healthier Weight) sell a pre-op box which contains sufficient meal replacement shakes for the pre and post op "liquids only" diet. Well, being the good boy that I am....stop laughing at the back.... I decided to try one of them yesterday morning instead of the Tescos own brand I had been using..... NEVER AGAIN.... they were so sweet I can still feel my teeth rotting away despite having cleaned them twice since! How they get away with selling such rubbish is beyond me! A quick look at the packet shows that they are mostly sugar which, as someone with diabetes and a hate of anything sweet, is about as much use to me as a chocolate tea pot!

So, I have 98 Healthier Weight shakes laying there waiting to be drunk that I have no intention of  ever going near again! If you want them, make me an offer....although I do realise I haven't really made a good job of selling them! Instead, I went to the well know slave employers Holland and Barratt and brought some whey powder with the intention of making my own protein shakes. I'll add some fruit, a drop of milk and a multi vit and it should do the same and leave me not facing a huge dental bill at the end of the day!

Right, that's sufficient from me for today....some might say the first line was sufficient but hey ho!

Bricking it....

No, not the Scarborough FC coach after the game back in 1977..... I didn't actually do the bricking but stood at the back holding coats and shouting encouragement in a moronic way as most brain dead 16 year old's are able to do. Now, as a still brain dead 53 year old I would never think about throwing a brick at a coach. That would just be stupid....

Anyway, returning from my idiotic teenage years: somewhere I would never like to return to, apart from the health and fitness I had then of course, you may ask why I was bricking it yesterday?

Well, I received notification of when I needed to be at the hospital which of course started me thinking about the operation and how nasty that will be (if you don't think it going to be uncomfortable etc, then have you really read up on it) and then how on Earth am I going to get back from there?

My issue is not the actual getting back, perhaps I should have put that a different way, but what happens to my wife (here after known as CBH- "considerably better half"), if I have to stay in overnight. CBH isn't good traveling alone in places she doesn't know, so I was worried that there was no way she could get home. Thankfully, to put my mind to rest, I spoke to the nurse who will oversee my care who informed me I would be out that evening, around 7pm as very very very few people need an overnight stay. Phew.

However, thinking about it a bit further, do I really think that after quite major surgery (okay, some would argue that its not that major.... being cut open in at least four places seems major to me) and being given blood thinning drugs and painkillers, is it right to send someone home with only CBH to care for them. Now I know (or lets be honest, would like to know) that CBH would look good in a nurses outfit, she isn't a nurse and with no A&E in town after 10pm (f*cking Tories closed it down and still got re-elected. I don't understand the people of this town at times), if something goes wrong, it could turn serious.

As you can see from the above, I love looking on the bright side of life... to this end, I also updated my will yesterday leaving everything to CBH, although I told her the local cats home was getting it all; which she seemed okay with....? (We have six cats so the money will go to them in the end!)

Returning to the subject of getting home. Being banned from driving for 48 hours, we have two choices of how to get home. My preferred method would be by train from Birmingham International. If we knew when I would be discharged, I could book a First Class ticket back for as little as £5! Now I know First Class may seem a little poncy but for a fiver???? Or, we could go home by taxi....

Now I have a thing about taxi's in that their regulation is quite lax and I am never a fan of being driven by someone else...no one is as good a driver as me and I am willing to shout at anyone else on the road who dares to challenge me on this....as CBH says, if we get to the end of the street without me seeing a moronic driver, we have done well. That's quite harsh given we live four houses from the end of the street! However, after speaking to the hospital who recommended a taxi firm, I gave them a ring and for only £61, they are happy to drive me and CBH home without pre booking. That's not bad really as long as the driver doesn't think he it James Hunt or drives like one!

Do I feel more relaxed about the operation et al? A little I suppose but I still wish it wasn't happening and I could get my weight under control in a natural way. However, I tried that and it doesn't work for me. Oh, quick laugh....the nurse I spoke to asked me how the pre-op diet was going. Okay I said... I was a bit hungry this morning so I had a fry up. You should have heard the sharp intake of breath from her.... until I explained that it was a non fried fry-up of tomatoes, mushrooms, a few beans and one egg. And lovely it was too.

Finally, or this post will end next week.... did a quick ride after work last night. Only 11 miles in 52 minutes but it did feel a little easier. I didn't go further as I promised to be back in time for tea and at 4pm on a Friday evening, the traffic tends to be quite heavy.

Right, enjoy your weekend...off for a bacon and egg sandwich for breakfast.... non fried and without any fats of course!

T-7 days.... dieting is easy....

Today is the half way stage of my pre op diet. So, with major nerves, I "jumped" onto the scales. Well actually, I have a long wee, a large poo and tried to breathe out as much as I could before stepping into the scale.

Did it work? Have a lost weight after eating less than 1 000 calories a day for seven days? Also, I have topped up the exercise I have undertaken to at least half an hour a day.

"Well," I thought stepping off the scale: "That can't be right." So, I tried again. And yes, it did seem right.

So it seems that dieting and more exercise does actually work and you can lose weight. However, losing weight is easy, its keeping it off that hard. I am sure that if I was not going to be chopped in half next week and a mega large piece of plastic stuck inside me to stop me from ever enjoying my life again...........not actually true but there is part of me that believes this! There is another part of me which tells me that if I lose weight, then oppotunties currently not available to me will eventually become so.

Take for example the fact that today is the first day of the Audax New Year (happy New Year all... and no we don't have dancing dragons or fireworks is Audaxers.... we prefer bus shelters and cake. For those who have no idea what Audax is, this should help: http://www.aukweb.net/aboutauk/faq/  And no, you do not need a beard.  Or at the moment I am reading a book about the National Hill climbing championship (A Corinthian Endeavour by Paul Jones. Available in all good book shops and on Amazon for those who don't mind their tax avoiding nature). It would be nice to be able to climb hills on my bike such as the Col de Hyde Lea or the mighty "Col de King Cod (might have to avoid this latter Col as it takes me to my favourite chippie!).

So life is a bit of a balance. I have to suffer now for gain later. Or do I give up and carry on as I have been doing so, and lose out now and lose out later as well? Silly really as a decision has already been made and the operation is go ahead next Thursday: the 8th.

To that end, I received the paperwork from the hospital today.  Got to say, for a private hospital who are charging a substantial amount I would think (no idea really but I would estimate that a couple of grand out of what I have paid will go to them for the use of the room and the theatre, but of course, I might be miles off) its a bit mean for me to have to pay for postage to return an admission form to them. Oh and they want my credit card details in case I buy a newspaper or something when I am there. God, what meanies, I'll buy my copy of the Morning Star on the way there.

It seems I have to be there around 12.30pm (oh and while I am moaning, the standard of English in the letter was poor. Yes I know I am one to moan about poor English but that's never stopped me!) so hopefully they will "do" me around 2pm and I will be out around 6 to 7pm and home by 9pm? It would be useful if Healthier Weight/the hospital gave me more information but as I am expecting a phone call from them in  the next day or so, I'll ask then.

Okay that's enough for today. And in case you were wondering, I have lost 5kg this week (or 11lb). That's a hell of a lot for one week but as it feels like I have given up eating, its not surprising! Its certainly not a level I could keep up for any length of time!

The pre-op diet

So, as part of the whole gastric band procedure, it is expected that the person having the band fitted goes on a pre-op diet with the view of reducing the size of their liver, so the surgeon can have room to work and to fit the band.

I started this last Thursday and let's be in no doubt, its tough! I mean, I must have been eating well over the recommended 2000 odd calories a day a man is said to require to get this size, so cutting down to 850 to 1000 a day isn't easy, especially when it means cutting down on the things I love, like fats, bread and chips. So instead I have been eating a lot of veggies, the odd egg and diet shakes.

Now diet shakes are low calorie and intended to be a balanced meal in their own way. The only issue with them is that they taste unlike the real fruit they claim to be and that they are very, very, very sweet. I dislike sweet things.... yes, a bit strange for a fatty but there it is. I have tried adding natural fruit but that makes it even sweeter!  

I am also finding that I am feeling tired all the time at the moment. Whether this is linked to the diet, I don't know. I do know that I fell asleep twice during the afternoon yesterday and despite sleeping well last night, feel knackered this morning again.

Sorry if this is coming over as a general moan...its one of my bad points according to my CBH but while I am at it, can I moan about the pre-op diet booklet provided by the people doing my operation: Healthier Weight. Its not as good as I expected and given that I spent over £6K with the firm, I would have expected something a little more tailored than the document I received. Thankfully there is now the internet (Question... what did we do before the internet.....oh yes, talked to each other and went to the library to look things up....remember libraries? They were the places they stored books before the Tories closed them down. Bastards) so I was able to do some research and get a better idea of what I should be doing. Also, I have ordered a book from the devil that is Amazon (pay some bloody taxes) called "Gastric bands for Dummies"...catchy title... which I hope has more information.

So anyway, has this pre op diet worked? Well I have no idea what size my liver is this morning but it does seem that I have lost 4kg (8.8lb) in four days so it seems to...... HANG ON A MINUTE... 4kg in 4 days. Surely if I can lose this amount of weight so quickly just by going on a mega strict diet I can get away without the operation. Well you would like to think so but sadly there is no way I could stick to this for more than a few more days, if I was doing it without the "reward" of an operation at the end of it all. As I said in my first post, this is NOT EASY and anyone who thinks it is is either a fool or is not taking it seriously.

Enjoy your day. I am off to find something tasty and low calorie to eat for breakfast..... not sure such a food item exists sadly.

So, some cycling.

Well I call myself a cyclist... some would rightly call me a fat slob but hey ho, so its about time I did some cycling...hummmmm.

As I may of said, a couple of weeks ago, I slipped and damaged the back of my left knee. This has been quite painful to walk on or indeed, put in certain positions. So, I've been doing all the right things: elevating it, resting it and keeping my weight off it. It is the leg I hurt in my car crash so it has never been right but come Friday, it was feeling okay to test out. Thus, off to the disused railway line at Haughton for a quick ride.

For those who like me, like the history of train transport in the UK, the disused railway line I am talking about ran from the market town of Wellington in Shropshire, to Newport Shropshire and then via Gnosall (the G is silent), Haughton and Derrington ("they" didn't put a stop in Derrington as it is only two miles from Stafford so they felt people would prefer to walk.....most people struggle to walk to their cars now days!) and then on to Stafford station. The line was some 22 miles long and closed in 1964 if I remember correctly, although a bit to the MOD base was still open until around 1990 and about 10 years ago "they" reopened a section from Wellington to the other side of Hadley in the hope that firms on the industrial estate thereabout would use rail transport....they didn't and the yard is mostly empty apart from stored units.

Once the line was a major link between Strewsbury, the coal fields and ironworks around Ironbridge and mid wales. However, after 1964 it was left to rot upon closer with all major stations and the bridge at Gnosall being removed. However, about 15 years ago, the section of line from Stafford to Derrington opened as a mixed use path. Slowly over time, this got extended to Haughton and then on to Gnosall (once they had sorted out a farmer who didn't want people crossing "his land"....add comedy voice here and some badger sets. Thankfully (and I mean this only for this farm), the farm went bankrupt so while the bank were faffing around trying to sell it, the council built the path anyway....not sure what happened to the badgers but they were: "no longer a problem...." Hummmm?

The path was then extended from Gnosall, down the hill past my a lovely bridge (if Iworkout how to do it, I'll stick a picture of the bridge up) and on it into stages to the road bridge over the Wilbrighton where the path terminated for a couple of years. If you wanted however...and had a bike capable of doing so, you could push on to Newport over the unmade route onto the next made section which run out from that town to a spot half a mile out of town. Thus, there was a gap of some mile between made sections. This was filled about 2 years ago giving the cyclist, or dog emptier, a 13 mile traffic free path to use.

The majority of the rest of the route from Newport to Wellington is either unused, or has been taken over by the mega fast A518. Its not a nice route to cycle on due to all the idiots in one ton boxes but luckily there are some nice backroads which can be used.

Anyway, enough history lesson... back to the ride! Well, as this was only a test ride, I decided to get "Richey" my CX bike out and do a few miles from the car park at Haughton...it used to be the goods yard...its strange how such a small place needed a good yards back in the day but then I supposed they had coal and stuff delivered and the local produce transported to market.... and off to Gnosall. Its about 2.5 miles each way with a small "climb" of about 70 foot each way. However, upon arriving at Gnosall, my leg felt okay so I pushed on; first to Wilbrigton and then to Newport itself before returning back to Haughton, a total of 13.6 miles in 1 hour 15 minutes. Quite a leisurely ride but this is not a path anyone should try to go fast on and those who do are morons....goes off to check his Strava for the ride....:-)

So, two days later how is my leg feeling...well sadly I did have a reaction to it so am hobbling a little. But, being the brave soldier I am, I am going to remember "Rule 5" and "Harden the F*ck" up.....it you don't know what the rules for cycling are, I'll cover them in a later post... and after shopping with my Considerably Better Half (CBH) later and mowing the lawn, I am going to head out for another cycle ride along a disused railway line...this time the Isobella Line. I bet you can hardly wait for a match report for that.

Finally, managing to stick to the pre-op diet although did stray a little last evening after returning home from seeing Alan Carr at the Civic Hall in Wolverhampton....match report: he was okay.... when I had an additional piece of toast not accounted for in my daily calorie intake. I will do better!

T-14....the countdown.

Yesterday (Thursday 24th Sept) was T-14.... the first day of the liver fat reducing diet and was it easy....well it was okay but I was hungry in the afternoon but I suppose I will have to get used to this until the band is fitted. Once fitted, according to all the guff, the way the band is fitted will mean I feel full quickly. That will be a God send as currently I struggle to know I am full.

So what did I eat yesterday then....well an egg on toast for breakfast (only allowed six eggs per week for some strange reason....six a week?!!! I could happily eat six at once go) followed by a diet milk shake for lunch. This was rather too sweet for my liking but as I will be living on them for five weeks, I suppose I should get used to them. Finally, for tea we had a curry.....No, not a gut busting take away, but a Quorn Thai curry from Tescos with 60g of rice (or, hardly any) and a large salad. Overall I suppose my daily intake was just less than 1 000 calories, or, as it used to be called...breakfast.

It does seem strange eating so little but I did find that if I chewed slowly, something I really had to work at, and put my fork down between mouthfuls, it did seem to be enough at the time. I did have a couple of plums later in the evening which is better than eating a sandwich or something before bedtime as I know I used to do.

My buggered calf muscle is still giving me pain, so not much exercise was undertaken (well I did go to Tescos and to Aldi's to do some shopping...more on Aldi's in a second) and mow the back lawn. Today, I am going to get one of my five bikes out and head out down the disused railway line to see if I can do a few miles without too much pain. Wish me luck.

Returning to Aldi's....they had one of their cycling events yesterday where I managed to pick up the only XL cycling jacket they had in stock. Does it fit...well, I can do it up...just... but the majority of my rather excessive gut hangs under it, so I doubt I will be using it for the time being. Perhaps I should go back and buy a medium jacket.... well I might need one by next winter. Actually, time for some positive thinking here... I will need one for next winter!

A life changing decision.

Everything changes for me tomorrow. My life will never be the same again. With luck and a hell of a lot of hard work and determination, my all aspects of my life will improve. So you could say tomorrow is the second most important day of my life, ever…the first being when I was born.

For those who have never met me: that’s the majority of you, I have had a chronic weight problem for the majority of my life. Indeed, I was 80kg when I left school at 18. Not bad really but that’s the lightest I have been as an adult and at only 1.65m, even then I had a BMI (yes, I know BMI is a challengeable measurement but it’s one most people understand so I am going to use it) of 29 putting me in the overweight category. Thing is, back in the day, cycling and playing football kept me reasonably fit so I didn’t really think about losing weight that much. However, a broken ankle in at 24 put an end to all that and by the time I met my lovely and thin soon to be wife at 28 (well 10 years later….she had to check first that I was the one before we married!), I had ballooned to 95kg.

 Settling down and losing the will to look good…. I had “caught” a wife so why bother……. saw my weight slowly increase to around 110kg. Having Cannock Chase on my doorstep was good as I could get out on a MTB and do a few hours rides per week. That and Weight Watchers managed to bring my weight down to 100kg. However, weight loss never seems to stick and soon I had lost the will and the weight went back on. This happened a number of times until the 2nd Feb 2002 when I had a car accident which damaged my left leg so much that it was too painful to cycle anymore.

Well at least that’s what I told myself until 2009 when finally at 131kg and with a BMI of 48.1, I managed to get back on a bike and do some miles. In fact, 2010 was a good year for cycling for me with over 5 300km achieved. Slowly, my weight went down to 117 kg but then, I hit the wall…not a real wall but a weight loss barrier and slowly, the weight went back on and up to 124kg.

As you can guess, carrying around 71kg than the NHS says your ideal weight should be has taken a toll on my life. I have had massively high blood pressure: 220/120 at one stage which in a family where strokes seem to kill one in three, isn’t perhaps the best thing to have (both my father and younger sister had strokes in their forties), while I had developed type 2 diabetes which is poorly controlled by metformin (my last six month blood test came back with a score of 9.3….it should be below 7). All in all, I am in a bit of a mess health wise. Indeed, two years ago my GP gave me five years to live unless I lost a bucketful of weight.

 Not wanting to die in my early 50’s I tried to lose weight: I joined the gym, tried to increase by cycling and swimming sessions and tried to lose diet. Again it worked to a degree but again I couldn’t get below 117kg! Slowly however, the weight goes back on and despite trying again and again, I now find myself at 128kg. Not a good weight to be is perhaps an understatement.

 So what is the point of this post and why is my life going to change completely from tomorrow? Well, tomorrow I start the pre-op diet needed before I can have a gastric band fitted.

Now I know I might get some negative comments about this from some people (not saying I will get some from this forum but who knows) but this is certainly not something I have not thought long and hard about. The one thing I am totally clear about is that this IS NOT an easy cheat to weight loss. It certainly is not easy (if you believe it is, try reading the rather excellent booklets produced by Oxford Radcliffe Hospital), it really needs to be worked at (at least half an hours walking/exercise each and every day…currently I cycle two to three times a week) and is not guaranteed to succeed as it is possible to overeat and put on weight with a gastric band fitted. It is also possible to over eat and vomit; to eat the wrong things and not get the nutrients you require; while there are some side effects which can result in the need for emergency intervention and/or in a very small number of cases, death. No, if you think a gastric band is easy then having one fitted IS NOT FOR YOU!

Then there is the cost. My GP said that it would be possible to put me on the waiting list for an NHS operation. However, this could take over two years and there would be no guarantee that funding would be possible at the end of this wait. While there is a debate to be had whether such operations should be undertaken on the NHS, I don’t think I can wait any longer as my health is being damaged every day I am overweight, so I have decided to go private. The cost (£6 299) is also something not to be taken lightly also. Also, going private goes against my principles but then, like buying a house, my wife told me where I could stick my principles. It’s quite nice to hear she wants me to get healthy and to hang around for a few more years….and no, its not just so I can build up a larger pension pot she tells me……

So there you are, tomorrow I start the pre-op diet and on the 8th Oct, I go under the knife. For four weeks after that, I will be living on liquids and very soft foods before going on a 20:20:20 diet….eat a piece of food the size of a 20p piece, chew 20 times and eat for no more than 20 minutes a time. Completely life changing and designed to make you feel full quickly and thus, meaning you don’t eat until you explode. Will I lose weight? Well according to the paperwork, I should lose 50% to 60% of my excess weight in two years. My surgeon however, feels that I should lose considerably more than that and keep it off as the gastric band is in there for life, meaning if you do put on weight, it can be adjusted to restrict the amount you can eat. I am not aiming to need to do this!

Thanks for reading this